home-centered education

I'm still tottering on the fence of this great divide between institution- and family-centered education. Truthfully, I have more accurately fallen over the family- side of the fence, and am clawing at the wood to see if there is a safe and reasonable way back over to the other side. Surprisingly enough, after a year of standing on the fence convincing my husband how much greener the grass is, we're now both over here, and have discovered that, though lush, it's also very muddy, and the upkeep is much more frequent. I'm not naturally good at tending things. I mean, I don't have plants or pets for a reason. But for whatever reason, it seems God has given me and hubby these ideas with roots that just keep growing.

I think the difference between me and the ideal home-schooling mother is that I don't feel naturally gifted in the home, nor do I feel well-suited to this life. I do, however, have a compelling desire to do the right thing by my children. I wont do it begrudgingly, but it might not be pretty and it wont be perfect. I'm okay with this . . .most days.

Today, was a good day in the mothering realm. It wasn't spectacular, but it gave me hope enough to grace my fall into the garden of home-education.

I awoke to my son gently kissing my cheek, saying "mommy, wake up, I have some holy water for you and our baby." My grown-up five year old had gotten a plastic cup, tiptoed to our prayer corner, and poured me (and in-utero Lyda) some blessed Theophany water we took home from church the other day. By lunchtime we'd said our morning family prayers; made our beds (something the kids are totally showing me up at doing!); I read aloud exerpts from Beowulf, Odysseus, and King Arthur; Eden vaccuumed the kitchen and hallway with her new vaccuum; Emmanuel made PBJ sandwiches for us; we ate together. After lunch, they had quiet time while Evangeline napped, and I read a few pages of "Way of a Pilgrim" in the quietness of my cozy bed. Meanwhile, E-man played with his marble ball track, and Edie put her dollies to bed. Next, they created snakes with playdough, and then we painted attentively in the kitchen together. Afterward, they cleaned the kitchen floor (with vinegar and baking soda)by "skiing" on sponges - they are very thorough, and love this job! After a bath, we then sat down together to watch a library movie Crocodile Hunter, while I preped for dinner, and tended to EvaRuth. When Ben came home, he lit a fire, and we had a picnic dinner in the livingroom, enjoying the warmth of the house.

The day was significant to me because, being productivity-driven, I can sometimes get overwhelmed with what's not done, instead of being present in the reality I have been given. Today, I was able to finish some necessary tasks while also teaching my children how to do it, or rather utilizing their proficient assistance. I was also able to slow down and enjoy them, taking the day as it came, without too much of a list getting in the way. Anyway, it was a good day at home.

It is strangely wonderful when my eyes let me see the most ordinary things as extraordinary. And even better when I begin to feel at home in the ordinary practice of being a mother. Maybe I'm not a natural, but I know I was born for this.